Saturday, December 10, 2011

Surgery Day! (Not for Ellie, but Claire)

 Well, I'm still trying to figure Blogger out, so this is this day in a nutshell.  But in total random order. (Because I'm not sure how to switch them around.)  If you know how, leave me a comment.
Ever since Claire was born, she sounds like a Pug Dog.  She breathes incredibly heavy and has a terrible time sleeping.  She would wake with apnea spells during the night so it was determined that her adenoids which were extremely large, needed to come out.  Along with that they did a Bronchoscopy and Laryngoscopy sp?  She also had been diagnosed with laryngomalasia since birth, floppy airway.  So this was hopefully going to get her on the road to recovery.  Well it worked, for three days and then we are back to the same rough chronic cough and bad nights.  A biopsy was taken and she does have gastro reflux:(  We started her on Zantac and we will have to see what else we can do when we see the Gastro Intestinal Doctor three months out!  We have survived 20 months of no sleep, what's another three, right?

As bad as surgery went for Ellie, this one went really well.  I still did my surgery routine.  I can't eat the morning of except for a Coke.  I am superstitious about what I wear.  I can't wear eye makeup in case I cry.         I must have my LIVESTRONG bracelet.  That helped me get through the surgery from Hell with Ellie.  And I spend every moment the night before trying to memorize their face and their laugh etc. just in case.  Silly I know, but it works for me.  I still have nightmares slumping to the floor and watching everyone race to Ellie's MRI room where they called a CODE BLUE over the loud speaker.  I remember thinking, is this how it ends?  No parent should stand by and watch their child be resussitated. Bad Memory, anyway, this one went the way they should go.  It still rips my heart out to hand over your child and part ways.  It never gets easier, anytime they are put out.  I did stay at the hospital and actually left to go to the cafeteria and eat with Nate.  I usually escape the hospital, just in case they call a code.  Hate the over head speakers.  I jump every time.  While we waited, they gave her some Versed.  Love that stuff!  With in minutes she was bobbing her head and acting dilirious.  Hilarious!!!  She would drop her head and I would say, " say cheese".  She would slowly lift her head and say, "cheeeeeeeeeeeeese".  It took about an hour and when I came back, she was super sleepy.  So we let her sleep until she popped up about an hour later sat straight up and was wide awake.  Also funny, if you were there.

 This was Claire on a high running laps around the surgery waiting room.  She hadn't clued in that we were there for her instead of Ellie.

 This was her waking watching Tangled.  She wanted her I.V.  out so bad.  They put it in after she was asleep, which was a pleasant surprise.  
 This was snuggle time with Mommy.  She was pretty much on high after that. 
 See, I told you they are out of order.  This was her when I first came back to see her.
Soooo very sleepy when we first saw her.
 Before surgery, running laps still.  She loved running this doll from the horse to the high chair and back.
 She thought she was in heaven.  Watching movies all day and eating chocolate pudding in bed.
 It didn't seem to phase her until three nights later.  She actually slept for three glorious days.
 Don't worry, she is back to her toss and turn, scream in the night self.

Tuesday, December 6, 2011

You Know Your A Cancer Mom when...

The other day I was changing Claires diaper and I noticed some nasty looking bruises on the back of her leg that went up to her back. Immediately my mind raced and went into worst case scenario mode. "Oh no, could this be Leukemia?" I thought to myself that she had looked a little pale lately. She has the cutest pudgy belly so then I thought, could she have a tumor in there?  My mind raced. Surely cancer can't hit the same family twice. Then I started to plead with the lord that this not be cancer and that I could not handle having another child with a serious illness. During the two minutes, I debated calling my Oncologist and my heart beat began to race like it did when they first told us Ellie had a tumor. I was starting to get physically ill when I took a wipee to the bruise to get a better look. To my astonishment, the bruise smeared! It wasn't a bruise at all, just a little girl that needed a bath and one embarrassed mother. I try not to do it, but I've diagnosed everyone I know with either cancer or a heart problem at some point. We have gotten worst case scenario not once but twice so forgive me if I recommend that your child go see a doc.