CureSearch walk for Children's Cancer

This year we are proud to report that CureSearch Salt Lake City has already raised $100,000 for Childhood cancer!  This is sooo exciting!  My goal this year was $500.  I have a ways to go to reach my goal.  I would like to get there by the walk which is Saturday, September 29, 2012.  When I started this journey with Ellie I knew I had to help find a better way for these kids.  That's why I support CureSearch.  They give almost every cent to childhood cancer research.  That's almost unheard of.  I hope that one day there is a cure.  And for Ellie and others like her I am willing to fight for this cause.  I know a lot of you have asked how they can help.  I have linked it to my blog so you can go directly to her fundraising page.  Our team name is Ellie's Angels.  I am doing a Bake Sale on Thursday if you are interested in coming out to that or donating a dessert or cookies.  It will be on the corner of Clark Lane and 1525 W. in Farmington.  Ellie is doing well and has been stable for two years now.  We feel very fortunate but are always on edge that it could come back.  It is more than overwhelming when you are told your child has cancer. I love all of our friends and neighbors in all the love we have been shown and these past few especially. Thanks for all you guys do for us.  This is also a very special day and we would love to see as many friends and family as we can there.  We are celebrating five years since we held our daughter Eve.  It's her birthday and what better way to celebrate than doing something for a great cause.  Will you be our voice?  In the last 40 years, the overall survival rate for children's cancer has increased from 10% to 78%. At CureSearch, our goal is 100%.

Be Part of the Cure

To reach our goal of 100% cure rate for children with cancer, CureSearch is mobilizing individuals, families and corporations across the nation to join our efforts. CureSearch has Regional Offices throughout the country that organize events and activities to raise funds for research on behalf of children living with cancer. http://www.curesearchwalk.org/saltlakecity/elliesangels

Will you be my voice?

Ellie and some local cancer fighting cuties are in this video.  http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FW6obR4xj5A

I am a Child of God

I've been thinking a lot about life and about our little Eve lately.  She is always in my heart and wonder how different things would have been if she were still here.  I know that I have grown so much in so many ways since she left.  She will always have a piece of my heart.  I came across these verses the other day and couldn't help but think of our little girl in the arms of  her Father in Heaven.  

This is a song that is written for children who have gone back to our Loving Heavenly Father and Jesus Christ. It goes to the song, I Am a Child of God.

I am a child of God and He has called me home.
My earthly journey's through
but still, I do not walk alone.

He leads me, guides me, walks beside me,
helps me find the way.
He welcomed me with open arms.
I live with Him today.

I am a child of God and I have gone ahead.
My earthly life was brief but oh,
such peace and love you gave.
You loved me, held me,
stood beside me and though I cannot stay.
You gave me much to help me
and I live with Him today.

I am a child of God and I will wait for you.
Celestial glory shall be ours,
if you can but endure.
I'll lead you, guide you, walk beside you.
Help you find the way.
I'll welcome you with open arms,
One bright Celestial day.

I LOVE chocolate milk!

I LOVE chocolate milk!  Doesn't everyone?  At night time, I usually cuddle my little Claire as she is getting ready for bed.  I sit in my rocker and get to snuggle her as she drinks her night time bottle before bed.  I love to whisper to her how much I love her and she nods and sucks her bottle down.  The other night as I was whispering "I Love You Claire Bear,"  she paused for a second took her bottle out for the first time after I said this, and says, "I love Chocolate Milk."  Now I know what she is really thinking when she nods.  Gotta love my little Claire Bear!

Paper vs. Plastic

(I finally got the pictures added but this post was written a few weeks ago.)  We had a fun day last Friday.  To tell you how it started, I have to go back to the week after Christmas.  We were at a friends party when one of my neighbors told me that she saw Macy's picture on their paper bags.  I was confused at what she was saying.  I had no idea that Macy had entered a contest at school for Harmon's Grocery Store.  I went home and asked her if she had won a contest for Harmon's.  She said she didn't know if she won and that it was probably one of the other Macy's at the school.  A few days later, we managed to get over there and low and behold, there it was with her name on it.  M gave the silly stern, trying not to smile grin. So her.  I could tell she was so excited to have won.
They got back to school, and a few of the other kids had seen it and were so excited for her.  The class of the person who won got to have an ice cream party provided by Harmon's.  So on Wednesday I got a call from her teacher that Harmon's would be here to present her the award and the party.  On Friday we came to the school and before we walked in, I asked the presenters a little about the contest.  They do four contests a year and the different stores take turns hosting the contest.  This was Farmington's first contest since they have been open for this.   The schools around it then submit their entries.  At their school, they did it in their art class and the children got to draw a picture.  The rules were that they could only use three colors and the lettering had to be so big.

Macy with her teacher and the Harmon's representative.

 The kids thought Claire and Ellie were so cute!

 We had to get some too!

 Grandpa got to come and enjoy the festivities.

 The kiddos were super excited for the ice cream party!

 Macy, holding back her excitement. 

 Macy with her teacher, Art teacher, and Harmon's reps.

It was a special day for her and she had a fun time being the center of attention for a few minutes.  They presented her with this framed picture of her bag and a twenty five dollar gift certificate to Harmon's.  The kids then got an ice cream sunday party and cookies.  It was a fun day!  Now when you go to Harmon's opt for paper vs. plastic and take a look at her Winter Wonderland!

The Gifts

Christmas is one of my favorite times of the year.  I am amazed every year when I see miracles happen.  We too have been extremely blessed when it comes to others.  Usually anonymous.  When my daughter was four we were sailing along in life.  Things were going well.  My daughter taught me a great lesson that year.  She saw a need and came to me with that piggy bank and asked if we could go take it to someones doorstep and leave it for them.  It couldn't have been more than ten dollars but it taught me a valuable lesson of selflessness.  For all she new it was a hundred to her.  But she felt that this other family needed it more.  Than fast forward to the Christmas of 2009.  We had spent a week in the hospital for an illness that most people do o.k. with, but for Ellie and her weak heart, I watched her struggle for every breath and wondered if this was how it would end.  We left the hospital exhausted and beaten.  I could care less if Christmas happened.  In fact, I was hoping it would just go away.  With M and A being seven and five they just wouldn't let me forget. As Christmas neared I was fearful of what Christmas would bring.  We had spent the summer coming up and down from St. George and the bills were piling up.  It was amazing how fast your life savings can disappear when life decides to take a hit or two or three.  Then came a knock on the door.  There was a jar of money on the front porch, then another knock and another.  I was amazed at all the anonymous gifts that helped us that year.  We ended up having a wonderful Christmas after all and it helped to pay some pressing bills at the time.  It changed my attitude around and made me so grateful for the people in this world.  It was amazing to know that they thought of our little family.  We were blessed and would like to Thank those that so selfishly gave when they could have kept that money for something great.  We only hope to pay it forward someday.  Even if it is ten dollars in a little piggy bank.  It makes me want to serve others any way I can.

So I am jumping around a little bit.  In 2007 we received an amazing gift from God.  It was our little girl Eve.  She was not meant for this earthly life and was too perfect to stay.  We got to hold her for a few hours and gave her a name and took molds of her hands and feet.  I felt the angels that day comforting us as they took her home. That Christmas a Family that had chosen a family to do a sub for Santa every Christmas had heard of our sweet Eve.  They decided that year the family would be ours.  And instead of presents, they would give the gift of a Grave Marker for our little girl.  Every time we went to her place, the grass was fainter and fainter and soon blended in as if the grass no longer had been disturbed.  I cannot tell you how much that gift meant to us!  It gave her a place we could go to and for us was a priceless gift.  I know they never saw our eyes light up and the little ones jump for joy but I hope they know how much that gift meant to us.  I think about that selfless love a lot.  She has a place that would have taken a while for us to come up with and helped in the healing process to not worry about how and when we get her marker.  I feel heartache when I see a new grave.  I want everyone to have that same opportunity that we have.
We still see random acts of kindness from those we know and those that remain anonymous.  We loved going to California this year and could not have done that trip with out those loved ones who helped us get there.  We love you and are indebted to you.  Sorry for rambling, but I desperately want those that have thought of our family in thoughts and prayers have a special place in our hearts.

Surgery Day! (Not for Ellie, but Claire)

 Well, I'm still trying to figure Blogger out, so this is this day in a nutshell.  But in total random order. (Because I'm not sure how to switch them around.)  If you know how, leave me a comment.
Ever since Claire was born, she sounds like a Pug Dog.  She breathes incredibly heavy and has a terrible time sleeping.  She would wake with apnea spells during the night so it was determined that her adenoids which were extremely large, needed to come out.  Along with that they did a Bronchoscopy and Laryngoscopy sp?  She also had been diagnosed with laryngomalasia since birth, floppy airway.  So this was hopefully going to get her on the road to recovery.  Well it worked, for three days and then we are back to the same rough chronic cough and bad nights.  A biopsy was taken and she does have gastro reflux:(  We started her on Zantac and we will have to see what else we can do when we see the Gastro Intestinal Doctor three months out!  We have survived 20 months of no sleep, what's another three, right?

As bad as surgery went for Ellie, this one went really well.  I still did my surgery routine.  I can't eat the morning of except for a Coke.  I am superstitious about what I wear.  I can't wear eye makeup in case I cry.         I must have my LIVESTRONG bracelet.  That helped me get through the surgery from Hell with Ellie.  And I spend every moment the night before trying to memorize their face and their laugh etc. just in case.  Silly I know, but it works for me.  I still have nightmares slumping to the floor and watching everyone race to Ellie's MRI room where they called a CODE BLUE over the loud speaker.  I remember thinking, is this how it ends?  No parent should stand by and watch their child be resussitated. Bad Memory, anyway, this one went the way they should go.  It still rips my heart out to hand over your child and part ways.  It never gets easier, anytime they are put out.  I did stay at the hospital and actually left to go to the cafeteria and eat with Nate.  I usually escape the hospital, just in case they call a code.  Hate the over head speakers.  I jump every time.  While we waited, they gave her some Versed.  Love that stuff!  With in minutes she was bobbing her head and acting dilirious.  Hilarious!!!  She would drop her head and I would say, " say cheese".  She would slowly lift her head and say, "cheeeeeeeeeeeeese".  It took about an hour and when I came back, she was super sleepy.  So we let her sleep until she popped up about an hour later sat straight up and was wide awake.  Also funny, if you were there.

 This was Claire on a high running laps around the surgery waiting room.  She hadn't clued in that we were there for her instead of Ellie.

 This was her waking watching Tangled.  She wanted her I.V.  out so bad.  They put it in after she was asleep, which was a pleasant surprise.  

 This was snuggle time with Mommy.  She was pretty much on high after that. 

 See, I told you they are out of order.  This was her when I first came back to see her.

Soooo very sleepy when we first saw her.

 Before surgery, running laps still.  She loved running this doll from the horse to the high chair and back.

 She thought she was in heaven.  Watching movies all day and eating chocolate pudding in bed.

 It didn't seem to phase her until three nights later.  She actually slept for three glorious days.

 Don't worry, she is back to her toss and turn, scream in the night self.